Went to my first Lesbian Avengers meeting this evening. The group was smaller than I anticipated, although I was told that winter is the slow season.

I met many new and fascinating people and heard a lot about local politics that I was oblivious to. One thing I found out that was of particularly interesting to me was that there is work being done to establish shelters for homeless and/or battered transpeople in Boston. Having once lived on the streets for two years, I know all too well there were no shelters out there for transpeople.

( fighting with ed )

I took off my shoes and socks and noticed the burn on my left foot has formed a giant fleshy blister. I guess the burn was worse than I thought. It is a second degree burn. OUCH!

I thought my appointment with my psychiatrist was this afternoon. I was sure of it. I didn't remember the exact time, so I called to get it. When I called the clinic they told me my appointment was at 9:30. This revelation came at 9:20. They told me that my psychiatrist had a 10:00 cancelation, and that I was welcome to come in then. It was too short of a time frame to take the bus, so I decided I would take a taxi and come in. They charge me $35 for missing an appointment without 24 hours notice, and a taxi would be cheaper than that.

After I got off the phone with her, I called Arlington Taxi. They said they'd send a driver out. I scrambled to get ready. The taxi arrived quickly and was out front before I'd even finished getting dressed. I quickly put on my shoes, painfully popping the blister from the burn on my foot. I felt the damp ooze of blister fluid in my shoe.

I quickly ran out the door. Entering the taxi, I looked in my purse and noticed no money. I asked the driver to wait a second, as I needed to run back up and get something. Back in the apartment I noticed that much of the contents of my purse had spilt out onto the couch. As I collected the wayward money, I discovered there to be too small of an amount to take a taxi to Burlington. I thought I had a twenty, but alas, I did not.

Disheartened, I went back down to taxi and told the driver I wouldn't be able to pay for a taxi ride to Burlington and that I was sorry he came out for nothing. I offered him a couple dollars for his trouble, which he refused.

Back in the house, I called the clinic again to tell them I wouldn't make the 10:00 either. They asked me if I wanted to reschedule for another day. The next available appointment would be several weeks in the future and I'm not really sure if I want to go again anyway, so I said no. I don't like the medication she gives me and I have a therapist, so I don't see why it's necessary for me see her.

Well, hopefully the rest of today will go better. I'm off to bed so that I can wake up and start again in a few hours.

My plan of going to back to sleep and starting the day over has hit an unexpected snag: I'm not at all tired.

Looking back at last night, while I might have felt like a loser for struggling with my eating disorder, I really enjoyed the very open and accepting atmosphere of the Lesbian Avengers. Being around a group of such strong women makes me want to be stronger. Simply being around them makes me want to get past bulimia. That has to be a good thing.

I believe I have much I can contribute to the Avengers and I believe there is much I can learn and gain from them. I am definitely going back next week.

I got singled out in chauvinistos! Apparently they want to LAY me. I might be offended by them, if I had expected any of them to be capable any form of higher thought.