i took 5 hits of acid last night and did a lot of work on figuring myself out. a major crippling problem i have is self-doubt. it is so pervasive that i barely write poetry, play music, make art, or explore the universe anymore. i don't trust myself. i need to do confidence-building exercises. i need to get back in the attitude of "can do it" rather than "can't do it". i've been stuck in this rut for years, and i think i figured out how to get out. it's going to take some work, but i "can do it". i'm not quite ready to take on the world yet, but with some work i think i may just be able to do it. i feel like i've woken up from a long slumber. i'm still groggy, but i can see a new day.