Good Friday always makes me think back to the First House of Clocks. One of the more notorious parties we had there was the Be Bad on Good Friday Party. We crucified Ian and played Pin the Nail of Jesus. I remember someone shouting "the beer's on fire!" and rushing to put out the flames. You know it's a real party when you have a beer fire.

We had music in the old tinfoil covered playroom. The old playroom was crazy. I mean, really crazy. Tinfoil walls, strange paintings along with random items screwed into the ceiling. I had written on the walls and the floors. Blissfully hopeful things and abysmally awful things. The pictures on the walls didn't match up spatially with their frames. A Twister mat was the table cloth. It was me. Me then. Strange, cluttered, mismatched, bright, stark, broken, glowing, and scary. I'm different now. I am no longer that room. I am breaking out of a chrysalis, not sure yet of what I have become.

From the The Universal Household Assistant or What Every One Should Know (1884):

Cockroaches — ways to destroy. — 1. The disagreeable odor which the cockroach emits, and which soon permeates all places that it inhabits, proceeds from a dark colored fluid which it discharges from the mouth. The cockroach loves warmth and moisture, hence its populousness in kitchens where fire and water are almost ever present. It is a night prowler, and swarms out from its secret lairs on the departure of daylight.    For the destruction of the cockroach we recommend a mixture containing a tablespoonful of red lead, the same amount of indian meal, with molasses enough to make a thick batter. Set this on a plate at night in places frequented by the insects and all that eat of it will be poisoned. Another preparation is composed of one teaspoonful of powdered arsenic, with a tablespoonful of mashed potato. Crumble this every night at bed-time where the insects will find it, and it is said to be an effectual poison. Great care should be exercised in the use of such dangerous agents. An innocent method of destroying cockroaches is to place a bowl or basin containing a little molasses on the floor at night. A bit of wood, resting one end on the floor and the other on the edge of the vessel, serves as a bridge to conduct the insects to the sweet deposit. Once in the trap its slippery sides prevent retreat, and thus cockroaches may be caught by the thousands.    2. The following i said to be effectual: these vermin are easily destroyed, simply by cutting up green cucumbers at night, and placing them about where roaches commit depredations. What is cut from the cucumbers in preparing them for the table answers the purpose as well, and three applications will destroy all the roaches in the house. Remove the peelings in the morning and renew them at night.    3. Common red wafers, to be found at any stationers, will answer the purpose. The cockroaches eat them and die. Also, sprinkle powdered borax plentifully around where "they most do congregate," and renew it occasionally; in a short time not a roach will be seen. This is a safe and most effectual exterminator.    4. Borax is a very good cockroach exterminator. Take some pieces of board, spread them over with molasses, only sufficient to make the borax when sprinkled upon it stick, and place the boards in their haunts. Gum camphor is a speedy remedy to clear the house of cockroaches.

From the The Universal Household Assistant or What Every One Should Know (1884):

Household Hints. — Do not deposit wood ashes in a wooden vessel or upon a wooden floor.    Never use a light in examining a gas-meter.    Never take a light into a closet.    Never read in bed by candle or lamp light.    Never put kindling wood on top of the stove to dry.    Never leave clothes near a grate or fire-place to dry.    Be careful in making fire with shavings, and never user any kind of oil to kindle a fire.    Keep all lights as far from curtains as possible.    Always fill and trim your lamps by daylight, and never near a fire.    Good nice pie-crust can be made by always observing the following rule. One-quarter of a cup of shortening to every cup of flour used; to be mixed as dry as possible with cold water, and mixed only with a knife.    Take sweet butter only for baking purposes, and never fail to thoroughly beat together your butter and sugar, if you would be sure of good results in cake baking.    Have metal or earthen vessels for matches, and keep them out of reach of children. Wax matches are not safe.    Ground mustard mixing with a little water is an excellent agent for cleansing the hands after handling odorous substances.    Cut hot bread or cake with a hot knife, and it will not be clammy.    Salt extracts the juices of meat in cooking. Steaks ought therefore not be salted until they have been broiled.    In boiling dumplings of any kind, put them in the water one at a time. If they are put in together they will mix with each other.    Do not cut lamp-wicks, but trim them by wiping off with a scrap of paper.    Never boil vegetables with soup stock, for if you do it will certainly become sour in a short time.    Boil your cream for coffee, and see if the coffee will not taste better, as well as keep hot longer.    Pin-cushion covers made of cheese cloth embroidered and trimmed with lace, wear well and keep their looks.    Some one says that leaves of parsley, eaten with a little vinegar, will destroy the odor of breath tainted by onions.    Hot liquid lye is recommended for removing obstructions in waste pipes. Or let the potash dissolve over night in the pipes.    To wipe dust from papered walls, take a clean, soft piece of flannel. Of course it must not be damp, but the dry flannel will remove the dust.    Varnish the soles of your shoes, and it will render them impervious to dampness, and will also make them last longer. This is a good plan.    Clean the mica in stove doors with vinegar. Take clinkers out of stoves by putting a few oyster shells into the grate, when they will become loosened, and may be removed without injuring the lining.    Save the droppings from spermaceti candles, tie them in a cloth, and keep to smooth rough flat-irons.    Never starch napkins.    An old black bunting or cashmere dress may be made to serve a further period of usefulness by being made into a petticoat.    Between two evils choose neither.    Writing a will does not shorten life, and yet many men fear it will.    Save old suspender rings, and sew them on the corners of kitchen holders to hang them by. It will be easy then to flip them on to a nail, and they will not be so likely to get lost.    Powdered borax with a little sugar, blown into the cracks and crevices with a small bellows, will drive away house-ants.    Have a high stool in the kitchen to sit on when tired, to continue your work if necessary. Perched on its top you can wash dishes or iron with ease. A low stool placed on a wooden chair forms a substitute, but a poor one. A soft sheep-skin mat is restful to stand upon.    There is nothing better for cleaning brass or copper than coal ashes. They are also good to scour knives and forks with. For tin, whiting or fine sand is best.    To cleanse jars or jugs or any earthen vessel slaked lime is good, or warmed lye.    To keep a stove smooth, take a coarse and pretty large piece of flannel, roll it hard, and dip it in fine sand. Proceed to rub your stove whenever you are through cooking. Almost any stove will look better for being done the same way occasionally. Boiled starch is also very good to keep a stove looking well; put it on where it will not burn off — around the back and sides where it doesn't get very hot.

I had a swell time at the x_bluerose_x's party last night. I very much liked the banana chocolate goodness of Sex in the TARDIS as well as the strange Liqor 43 brontosproximo brought. I got a little more sloshed than I intended, and while I was not falling down drunk (which I haven't been in many years), I still managed to achieve stupid drunk (which I haven't been in quite a while either).

The crowd was jolly, and the floor show at the end was... well... interesting.

I just saw the birds that have their nest in the closet, and they are in fact european starling and not house sparrow. By seeing them enter, I know they are in fact in the wall and not under the floorboards. Baby starlings make me happy, too.

The right closet of my bedroom is filled with the squeaking of baby birds. There's a nest under the floorboards, which is where the roof meets the side of the house. The parents must be entering in a hole right above or below the gutter. By the frequency that I see house sparrow out front, most likely that's what's in there. Little birdies growing up right under my feet. It makes me happy, it's spring.

Out of curiosity yesterday, I did a search on Google for the address of the old house_of_clocks. First I tried "1261 Mass Ave". Nothing. I tried "1261 Massachusetts Avenue" and found the building. Finally, trying a combination of both approaches with "1261 Massachusetts Ave" I found the old house_of_clocks being listed for sale as a condominium. Having passed by the old house_of_clocks in Arlington Heights many times recently, I knew that the old apartment was being sold as a condominium, however it was interesting to read the description given of the place:

Arlington – $409,900 Spectacular renovation in 2004. This top floor 3 bedroom unit features new kitchen with granite, stainless appliances, ceramic tile floor, and new baths with ceramic tile floor. Hardwood floors throughout, spacious living room, private W/d, rear porch, large storage area, and deeded parking for 2. Windows, heat and hot water systems new in 2004. Steps to the "t" & shops. Don't miss this one! Listing Information Amenities and Features Listing ID 70332410 Near Public Transportation Price $409,900 Swimming Pool Bedrooms 3 Tennis Court Type Condo Walk/jog Trails Sq. Ft. 1,256 Baths 2

The apartment I remember is quite different. It was billed as a 4 bedroom with 1 bathroom. It definitely didn't have anything like stainless appliances, ceramic tile floors, or a granite kitchen. The building had neither and still has neither tennis courts and swimming pools, I imagine that the references to those in the listing are meant as "nearby" as is with the bike trail and public transit.

When we lived there, the entire three decker was completely run down and neglected by an elderly landlord that was in over her head trying to manage her many properties. Due to the dilapidated condition, we used to jokingly refer to our place as "the Crackhouse of Clocks". purpleglitter is making arrangements for us to look at the place as "potential buyers". I'd really love to see the changes. I doubt I'll recognise it at all. Just from the times I've passed it, I can see how much it's changed. The white picket fence in the neatly trimmed front yard advertises the new nature of the place. Time moves on.

IN THE OLD HOUSE OF CLOCKS

photo by purpleglitter

I've left reality behind and it feels good. No drugs (at least for now), no gimmicks, just madness. Sure, I'm aware of my surroundings. I'm not hallucinating - too much. I can still manage to whip up a nice curry as will. But everything that was bothering me is gone. Not here right now. I don't even really remember what it was. Sure, if I want to I can go chase it down, but fuck that shit. I'm good at dissociation, and it's high time we used it to to make ourself happy. It's a crazy sort of happy. Manic may be another word for it. Everything is happy right now. Of course my constructs may come crashing down tomorrow or even tonight, but right now I don't care. But I don't care. We will sit on the floor with my cane and cackle. It's all funny. Everything is. We are chattering and being many and one. Switching persons, switching phases, switching reality, switching being. Maybe I'm not really anymore insane. Maybe my feeling more insane is simply an illusion of my already existing insanity. I feel as if I'm flying in a sea of bananas and I don't want to dry off.

I forgot to mention last night that Project Three Meals also includes 30 minutes of exercise. It's just a simply healthy plan with a simple yet somewhat fun name.

So, how did today go?

For breakfast, I had rotini and sauce. For lunch I had rotini with tomatoe sauce. For dinner, I had... well I didn't eat dinner. For my healthy snack I had a cliff bar. In addition to that I had one of merryperseis's mom's chocolate chip cookies. Shouldn't have had the cookie, but should have had dinner.

I did get in 30 minutes of exercise. In fact I got well over three hours in my walk to Lexington Center from purpleglitter's house. I didn't really have any particular reason for the walk. I didn't even do it for the exercise. I just needed to keep moving. I kept singing that to myself along the way, "Gotta keep move'n".

purpleglitter picked me up in Lexington Center and drove me back home.

I'd stay up and make the dinner I didn't eat today, but I'm not doing to well tonight. I'm quite twitchy and dizzy and I've already ended up on the kitchen floor twice this evening, and I don't trust myself handling a hot pot or pan. So I'm off to bed and I'll try to do better tomorrow.

electricube and I met in Porter Square yesterday at noon ready for our trip to Cauldron Farms. We were both hungry, so electricube treated me to an Indian food buffet lunch before we left. I enjoyed it very much and felt ready for the trip.

When we got to Fitchburg there was no one waiting at the station. We waited for about 20 minutes, then electricube went to a nearby internet café to look up Raven's number while I waited at the station in case someone from the Farm arrived. Shortly after she left to get online I started having trouble walking. At first it felt like I was trying to get up a very steep hill even though I was on level ground. Soon I couldn't maintain my balance, so I sat on the ground. Luckily I was at a transit station and sitting there didn't look particularly out of place.

The spell didn't last too long and I was up to walking again by the time electricube got back with the bad news: Raven had canceled via e-mail shortly after we had started our journey. So no reading. A waste of money and a day.

It was two hours before the next train to Boston, so we decided to tool around town. We really wanted to find a coffee house, but were unable to. We did run into a cool queer kid who explained to us just how little there was actually to do in Fitchburg. I though with a small state university that they might have at least an okay coffee house, but I guess not. We did have fun talking to him and before we knew it, it was time to head back.

On the train back I had another "spell". More intense and twichy than the one in Fitchburg. This time I lost consciousness for what electricube tells me was five or ten minutes. Nobody usually pays notice to this things as long as one stays off the ground and doesn't make a good deal of noise. As I remained relatively quite in my seat throughout the episode, I was not hassled.

I did end up going to the ground shortly after we arrived at Porter Square, but again I was on a transit platform, so it didn't look particularly out of place.

electricube insisted on seeing me home, but didn't end up staying for very long.

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Once home I tried to get my computer patched to avoid the worm that I heard was going around yesterday. Unfortunately I still don't know if it is properly patched. It has intractable adware on and I need to reinstall the operating system. I'm very very tempted to install Linux instead of XP, because I'm so pissed off with Microsoft's policy of leaving gaping security holes in their products and then charging for products that attempt to fix those holes. I've already given up on Internet Explorer, maybe it's time to ditch them completely. I would miss Photoshop. That is the only thing stopping me.

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Today I woke up quite disorientated. My behind-elbow and behind-knee were really bothering me. I was a bit stumbly. But I'm not going to let my "spells" dictate my life, so I left the house anyway. I headed over to Walgreens, and almost made it to the door before I went to the ground in the parking lot. Again, as with these things, it was not a catastrophic fall as I knew I was about to go down. I ended up on all fours twitching because I wasn't able to properly orchestrate my decent. Quickly several people came by asking if I was "okay". I told them that I was, that this happens all the time, but they were insistent on "helping" me. They even called the emergency services. Oh joy!

The police arrived first. I told the officer that I was fine, that this happens all the time. He said that I should get checked out at the hospital anyway. I replied that they checked me out last week for the same thing and said it was nothing. That going again would be a waste of time. He seemed stunned by that statement, but I didn't really care. The firefighters and the paramedics arrived in quick secession, each again trying to convince me to go to the emergency room. I refused and signed their little thing saying I was refusing treatment.

Soon after they left, I went into Walgreens. I ended up on the floor in the back isle. Apparently "customers were worried", so management called the emergency services. I left before they could arrive.

I'm at purpleglitter's now. Still a bit dizzy but feeling better. Ready for more adventures.

Room available immediately in 4 bedroom on Mass Ave in Arlington. We are 3 very queer non-smoking individuals and 4 cats (even one of the cats is gay). Enclosed back porch with view of Spy Pond in winter. Beautiful hardwood floors, bay windows. Cable modem internet. Off-street parking. On 77, 79, 89, and 350 bus routes. 15 minute walk to Alewife redline stop. 30 minute walk or 10 minute bus ride to Davis Square. 2 floors. 2 bathrooms. Very spacious. $400+