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| Headaches | |||
From the The Universal Household Assistant or What Every One Should Know (1884), posted for
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| Bird Torture by Volkswagen | |||
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| Writer's Block: The Nose Knows | ||
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| Donnie Darko | ||
( spoilers ) | ||
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| The War Prayer by Mark Twain | |||
Much of Mark Twain's work is still quite timely. Written in 1904, but published shortly after his death in 1910, The War Prayer is one of those works. For those of you who haven't read it (and for those of you who want to re-read it), here it is:
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| Songs | ||
i had a song stuck in my head and i was able to push it out of my head and into my ear it was like i was really hearing it it didn't have that "in your head" effect it was quite wonderful i want to try it with all sorts of songs | ||
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| Stop | ||
i feel like i'm hopelessly broken i hate me i'm shakey all the time i'm on a thousand meds i cause emotional pain to those around me i want to die but i'm afraid sometimes that fear goes away enough to let me try i'm cold and scared i'm lost i just want this to end these loops leading nowhere i built this maze too well i can't find my way through it hurts it hurts i want the pain to stop get out of my head stop shaking fucking stop shaking get a fucking grip maybe i need to be institutionalized but i don't want that i keep typing the same thing day after day i'm getting nowhere fuck this let it stop i want to reach for a blade feel it on my skin i want anything to just stop this nothing works there is no solution i'm trapped in a web a maze and a riddle i keep going down the same paths there has to be an end a way out let me free | ||
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| Kitties and Humans | ||
there are many kitties in my room behind me the kitties like my room there are also two humans in my room behind me spider is suckling my coat the legs or the table are cold there is a rope pulling through my head the humans in the room are talking about alien aardvark babies and going through my "toy drawer" they want me off the computer i must go | ||
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| Merry Dreamer | |||
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| I Am Not Defeated | ||
My slip up yesterday will not be a slide back into bulimia. I will not go back to purging 3-5 times a day. Only purging once in the past week is still a hard-fought accomplishment. But I'm not satisfied with once a week. I want to be free of it. I want it out of my life. I know it will take a lot of effort, but I believe it's something I can do. Moving past bulimia will be a very powerful step towards getting better in general. ----- I haven't cut in about a month. I still self harm in other ways, everyday. Beating myself with my fists. Pounding my head into things. Whipping myself with coathangers. But I'm not drawing blood or leaving scars. However twisted, it's still progress. I must still fight the urge to cut everyday. So far this month I've been successful in doing that. I know if that I slip up, it won't be the end of the world. But, I intend not to slip up. I intend to get better. I intend to heal. I am not defeated. | ||
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| Drying Off | ||
I've had a bit of a rough night. | ||
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| Fish Scanner Head | ||
The drivers for my USB port aren't working, so I haven't been able to use the scanner. I was planning to bring a CD home from It doesn't matter now. Fish just knocked the heavy glass head from the shelf above the scanner onto the scanner. While it didn't break the glass, but it did knock it one side of the glass off from the plastic so that it droops down into the scanner, meaning the scans will no longer be in focus. Note to | ||
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| Chatter - rev.2 | |||
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| Itch Itch Itch | ||
Itch itch itch. I always get dandruff in the winter. I imagine it's the humidity. I've got little scabs on my scalp where I've itched too much. I need to get a bottle of anti-druff shampoo today. | ||
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| Orange Soda | ||
Lake poured orange soda on my head because I was watching Doctor Who. | ||
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| Chatter | |||
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| Goddess Quiz | ||
I saw the Goddess Quiz in 50% Persephone 25% Artemis 16.7% Athena 8.3% Demeter 0% Hera 0% Aphrodite 0% Hestia ( details ) | ||
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| Pain in the Neck | ||
My neck and shoulder are hurting again. The knot in the pillow, though it seemed a likely problem, was not the problem. I disarmed and removed the suspicious pillow last week. I don't know what's causing my neck and shoulder to hurt. It could be the activities of an alter. More probably, it's what Lake suspects: the position of my monitor. I have to turn my head slightly to look at my monitor while I type. I will try moving the monitor and see if that helps my neck and shoulder. | ||
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| Madeleine Madeleine Madeleine | ||
Within the closet sprawl lay a mostly emptied bag of Science Diet cat food. Madeleine, determined to get the few remaining pellets, stuck her head through the hole in the bag. Her effort was rewarded, as she got to the pellets. However, the hole which was just large enough to get her head in didn't seem large enough to get it out. She flailed around the room trying to get the bag off her head. After laughing a little (which probably didn't help her any), I went over and pulled the bag off her head. She was very embarrassed, as cats can get, and slunk out of the room. For breakfast today I made Lake and I heart shaped biscuits and broccoli gravy. Yum! | ||
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