The phone and DSL are back up and the ice is melting a bit. However, we're supposed to get a few more waves of ice later today and early tomorrow. After my voice post this morning, I went outside to take some photos and in the few minutes I was out there I heard a tree collapse in the woods nearby. My brother tells me he could hear several large branches or whole trees falling every this morning near him.

-----

I ordered my bus tickets online last night, but ended up with the wrong time for my departure from London. The confirmation has me leaving at 3:50AM, but there is no way I can get a ride to London at that hour. I was planning for my departure time to be 8:00PM. Talking to a Greyhound Canada representative on the phone, I was told that I could use the tickets for any departure time as long as they are for the same day and the same person. I should be fine

*knocks on wood*

Happy Thanksgiving to all of you in the United States.

Happy Thursday to everyone else.

I'm having a good visit. Maddie is a ball of energy, literally bouncing off the walls. She knocked on my door and got me up around 7:30am this morning showing me a clock that had been set to 9:30. Tricky, but I'm glad I'm up. I don't really like to sleep too late these days.

Dinner last night was good and I loved the port later in the evening. Christian is intelligent and charismatic, making conversation with him generally a pleasure. And, of course, it's always great to see Bridgette. She's made quite the life for herself and has not ceased to amaze me. I'm proud to call her sister.

I've been thinking about LiveJournal communities and how I will interact with them in the future. I still have ideas for new ones that should exist, but I have no interest in running them. At some point in the near future I may create one or two that are knocking on the inside of my skull trying to get out. However, once they get going I will probably give them away. That plan seems sounds good to me: I'll develop but not maintain.

I haven't been wearing make-up lately. I feel happy about that most of the time, but today I got he'd by the registration clerk at the center street clinic. I corrected him, and he made a feeble attempt at calling me she, but soon after said that he'd "send him up". I know that I pass better with make-up, but I don't want to be ashamed of how I look without it. I don't want to be ashamed of being a tranny. Wearing make-up just to pass in a way is being ashamed. Passing isn't everything, but it sure feels good. I don't want to be picked out, at the same time I don't want to hide behind face-paint. At this point I think I'm going to continue to use make-up sparingly, only for special events. It's tempting to go back to wearing it all the time, but the cost alone should rule that out. I'm saving so much money by not wearing the tons of make-up I once did. I think I'll stick with not wearing it, but if I get he'd too much I may reconsider. I don't want to, but passing is more than a vanity issue, it's also a safety issue. I'm a lot less likely to be harassed on the street if I pass. I haven't been harassed in a long time *knocks on wood*, but it is still a concern of mine. If I start getting harassed again, I'll probably go back to wearing make-up and be very pissed off at the world for making me do it.

i'm so very tired
i took 2mg of ativan to help me sleep
but then had the sudden urge to wash some knickers
they're in purpleglitter's sink right now
i have to stay up until i'm done cleaning them
but the ativan is kicking in
pulling me down
i want to sleep

today was a good day
spent the entire day sober
first time in a couple weeks
good to do that
was becoming too much of a pothead
i'm not giving up pot
i just don't think i'm going to smoke as much as i have been
it's gotten too out of control

just eight more minutes and i can take my knickers out of the sink
and go to bed
ah bed
i'm writing this post to stay awake
i want fresh knickers when i wake up
not soggy ones that have sat in the sink all night

i drank way too much coffee today
three cups
i'm supposed to limit myself to one cup a day
but i need caffeine
i'll try to cut down tomorrow

a skunk once saved my life
a couple years ago
i was going to kill myself
i had left during neitherday
(neitherday is the time between days
when it is no longer today
and not yet tomorrow
usually between 3am and 4am)
back to the story
i left during neitherday
i walked down the empty streets to the bike trail
i had a bottle of pills in my hand
a large prescription bottle with the word "EXIT" written on it
it was full of a mix of pills
every pill i could find
but on my way to the bike trail i ran into a skunk
the skunk saw me and stomped up and down on it's front legs
i've seen them do that on nature shows
it's their final warning before they spray
i turned around and ran in the opposite direction
back home
but i couldn't get in
i hadn't brought my keys with me
wasn't expecting to need them again
i didn't want to wake anyone in the house
but i thought merryperseis was still up
(she wasn't)
i looked for some small rocks to throw at her window
but i couldn't find any
so i threw the pills (but not the bottle) at her window
the pills failed to catch her attention
i ended up being forced to knock
luckily my initial gentle knocking was enough to get her attention
she let me in
and i went to sleep

sleep
sounds good to me right now
it's time to take the knickers out of the sink and head to bed
good night

i just took 200mg of seroquel
i should be heading to bed soon
if i'm really lucky i'll wake up without the flu
*knocks on wood*

The cranberry juice seems to be working.

*knocks on wood*

Something was just knocking on the pantry window. Knocking. It wasn't the window rattling. I know what that sounds like. Something was knocking. I looked out the window. Nothing. Just snow sitting on the roof below.

Just something new to add to the growing list of oddities here at the house_of_clocks. Most visitors to the house_of_clocks have seen people walking in the downstairs hallway. People that aren't there. I'm suspicious that those who haven't just don't talk about it. Doors here have been known to open and shut on their own in still air. Doors that greatly outnumber the rooms. Sometimes I can hear people moving about when there is no one else here. We have found secret compartments the walls. The faucets behave in odd, and sometimes unpredictable manners. The whole place feels strange. Unworldly.

-----

I ask myself, how did we end up with this place? The rent is so cheap, compared to anyplace of equivalent size, location, and upkeep. Two floors. Two full huge baths. Tons of rooms. Gigantic closets. Built in window seat in the livingroom. Amazingly crafted walls, moldings, and windows. The place is out of a dream. We should be paying at least twice as much in rent as we are. Probably more. None of us should be able to afford to live here. It seems outlandish that it just fell into our lap.

We had left some triple sec in the fridge, thinking it would be safe, since it was hidden in several bags, and could not be identified without first opening said bags. However, when we looked in the fridge last night, the bag had indeed been gotten into and a good deal of the triple sec had been drunk. I know it was Beeb, what's more, I know she probably drank it straight, which is incredibly pathetic.

At 5:00am, Beeb knocked on my door and asked me to turn my music down. I replied "Oh, I wanted to thank you for stealing our triple sec and not paying rent and bills", and left the music at the volume it was at before she complained. If any other roommate had complained about the volume, I would have apologized and immediately turn it down. Hopefully Beeb will get the message that this is never going to be a happy household for her again.

Bebe's pseudoboyfriend, Greg called at 6 this morning. He kept ringing the phone until I got up and answered. I knocked on Bebe's door. No answer.

Then at 7 and 7:10 her work called. I didn't get up, because I assumed it was Greg. At around 7:20, I got out of bed, because I could no longer sleep. I noticed that the last two calls were from the corner store, so I knocked on Bebe's door again. No answer

At around 7:30 Greg comes to the front door. This time I pound on Bebe's door. She responds. She told me she was ignoring the phone, because it was her day off and she didn't want them to ask her to come in. Excuse me, but she just told me that she couldn't pay me everything she owed last week, because she wasn't working enough hours! Not to mention having us woken up a million times this morning. I'm so glad she's fucking leaving at the end of next month.

After Lake and I finished watching the Sopranos tape, we found the front door slightly ajar. We closed it. A little while later Bebe knocks to get in.

Bebe is accompanied by two police officers. Bebe has an obvious shiner. I ask what's going on and one of the officers answers, "Beverly punched Bebe."

I was shocked. I thought Bebe was trying to pull some trick to get back at me for saying she only had a week left. I answered, "I'm Beverly, I didn't punch anyone."

The officer then explained that it was her ex-boyfriend who punched her with the last name of Beverly. I was relieved, but worried about Bebe.

Apparently Bebe has a restraining order on this fellow. However, her story that was talked about in front of the police of how the incident happened makes little sense to me.

She says she was punched around 10:00 in her room. However, I've been here almost all day, and the 15 minutes I wasn't here, Lake was. Neither of us heard an altercation. I find it hard to believe the whole thing happened in silence, as violent men are rarely silent. We never even heard anyone's voice other than Bebe's in the apartment. No one came and knocked on the door, and from as much as I could tell, Bebe spent the majority of the day passed out in her room.

I find it hard to believe that she could even explain how to get here to someone. She doesn't remember the address when asked.

I also don't understand why it took her over two hours to contact the police. And how did the ex-boyfriend find the place? Did she come with him, if so, when. I can't figure out a time span that we didn't know she was passed out in her room that she could have gone out, met someone, and come back

I know she was punched. But, something is fishy with her version of events. I hate to say it, but at this point I find it hard to believe her. I don't understand what her motivation would be for lying, but I can think of several possibilities. She might have went to his place and it just looks better from the restraining order point of view for it to have happened here, she could be trying to get us to pity her so we don't kick her out, or she might have been doing something that she doesn't want anybody to know about when it happened. Or, maybe there's an explanation for the inconstancies.

I want to believe her. I feel bad that I don't. The problem is she's really made her own bed as far as me believing that what she says is the truth. She said she is completely asexual when we interviewed her, four days ago she was telling me how she was able to get "20 men a night". She said she doesn't drink when we interviewed her, she's a raging alcoholic. She steals (at the very least) juice and alcohol from us, even taking it out of our rooms, and lies about it. Nothing as serious as this, but she just seems to have an ulterior motive to everything she says.

Bebe locked the bottom lock on the front door for the second time, after we explained to her over and over again that nobody has a key to the bottom lock. I knocked, but as she was in her room listening to her crappy music, she didn't hear. I then pounded door with my foot as hard as I could. It made much noise. She came and opened the door and complained I was so loud. Well I snapped. I asked when she was going to pay the $424 she owed (bills + last month deposit that she never paid). She complained that she thought she was paid up. I explained that the bills were on the refrigerator for over a week. She said she didn't think she should have to pay all that, especially the electric bill, since we use more electric than her. At that point Lake snapped. She growled that we would pay the electric if she paid the phone that she hogs in her room for hours and annoying hours on end. She agreed (which actually means she owes more money.).

Bebe then started crying. She thought we were friends. She's upset that we don't eat her soup. The topper, that just says everything was "I try to accept your lifestyle, which isn't normal." This is the last time I ever live with a straight person. I had decided that, but changed my mind. I thought that I should be more open minded. But I don't need this shit in my own home. NO MORE FUCKING STRAIGHT ROOMMATES!!

She's moving out at the end of the month, so we will find a new, better, queer roommate to replace her.

Fuck! Both John and Victor came separately as me and Lake napped for an hour. Because our light was off, Bebe assumed we weren't home so didn't even fucking knock on our door to check. I would have loved to have seen John, and Victor was coming to pay us much needed rent. It'll be fucking days before Victor can come again, and we could have seen John who's been out of fucking town for almost three weeks. I wish Bebe had more active brain cells than a dead mouse, it would make fucking living with her easier.