This has been a wonderful and merry Christmas so far. purpleglitter got me wonderful gifts, including a new birding camera — the same model as the broken one, so that it will work with my telephoto lens.

My parents gave me a brass clock once owned by my great-grandfather. It's an old electric clock and wasn't made with the ability to start up on its own. A knob in the back must be spun just right so that it "catches", then the electric power will take over. The neat thing about the clock is that it will run backwards if the knob is spun backwards. I used to always set it running backward when I was a kid, and it is running backwards in my livingroom now.

I had a wonderful Thanksgiving. merryperseis came over to join purpleglitter and I in the livingroom. She had never seen our new place before and she arrived with perfect timing – just 10 minutes before dinner

I cooked portobello and artichoke stuffing, corn on the cob, baked homemade macaroni and cheese, edamame, and a pumpkin and carrot pie that turned out to be more of a pumpkin and carrot pudding — but still quite good, if I do say so myself. We all stuffed ourselves silly and had a good and mellow evening. Good company and too much food is how Thanksgiving is meant to be.

I've been drifting away the last several days. The dizzy spells and twitchiness have enveloped me. I cannot move and flicker out. I fight this place, it is hard, but I am not giving up.

Sometimes I end up caught in a nasty cycle in which I have one of my "episodes", can't get up, and fall asleep. My "episodes" are more common and intense right after waking, and in these cycles I'll wake right into another episode, not be able to get up, and fall asleep again. Yesterday, I spent 3 hours on the couch in such a cycle – drifting in and out of consciousness.

I was planning a trip to Maine to see invalid_userid this weekend, but purpleglitter convinced me I should wait until the current wave subsides. However, in preparing for the trip I did find out that the bus route to Maine was quicker, cheaper, and more frequent than I had previously thought. This will make the prospect of making plans to visit less daunting in the future.

Project Schedule has not happened since Monday. I wonder if perhaps the concept is flawed. I've always had large portions of my work day where I could not be productive. I was able to compensate before, why not now? A refined and rigid schedule leaves no room for compensation. However, I am not sure if I should give up Project Schedule until I come up with a better plan to increase my productivity and ready myself for re-entry into employment.

Out of curiosity yesterday, I did a search on Google for the address of the old house_of_clocks. First I tried "1261 Mass Ave". Nothing. I tried "1261 Massachusetts Avenue" and found the building. Finally, trying a combination of both approaches with "1261 Massachusetts Ave" I found the old house_of_clocks being listed for sale as a condominium. Having passed by the old house_of_clocks in Arlington Heights many times recently, I knew that the old apartment was being sold as a condominium, however it was interesting to read the description given of the place:

Arlington – $409,900 Spectacular renovation in 2004. This top floor 3 bedroom unit features new kitchen with granite, stainless appliances, ceramic tile floor, and new baths with ceramic tile floor. Hardwood floors throughout, spacious living room, private W/d, rear porch, large storage area, and deeded parking for 2. Windows, heat and hot water systems new in 2004. Steps to the "t" & shops. Don't miss this one! Listing Information Amenities and Features Listing ID 70332410 Near Public Transportation Price $409,900 Swimming Pool Bedrooms 3 Tennis Court Type Condo Walk/jog Trails Sq. Ft. 1,256 Baths 2

The apartment I remember is quite different. It was billed as a 4 bedroom with 1 bathroom. It definitely didn't have anything like stainless appliances, ceramic tile floors, or a granite kitchen. The building had neither and still has neither tennis courts and swimming pools, I imagine that the references to those in the listing are meant as "nearby" as is with the bike trail and public transit.

When we lived there, the entire three decker was completely run down and neglected by an elderly landlord that was in over her head trying to manage her many properties. Due to the dilapidated condition, we used to jokingly refer to our place as "the Crackhouse of Clocks". purpleglitter is making arrangements for us to look at the place as "potential buyers". I'd really love to see the changes. I doubt I'll recognise it at all. Just from the times I've passed it, I can see how much it's changed. The white picket fence in the neatly trimmed front yard advertises the new nature of the place. Time moves on.

IN THE OLD HOUSE OF CLOCKS

photo by purpleglitter

About an hour and a half ago purpleglitter and I were putting up færie lights in the living room of the house_of_clocks, when I knocked something down from behind a piece of molding above the window frame behind the couch. purpleglitter thought it was an old cookie or some other harmless item. However, I recognised it as something a little more sinister: a mud dauber nest. It had four chambers, all of which visually appeared to be empty. The season would also suggest that to be the case. To be on the safe side, I wrapped the nest in plastic and put it in the freezer. Any larval mud daubers in there will not live very long. I had figured the mud daubers were nesting outside, I definitely was not expecting them to be nesting in the living room. It's an adventure every day.

purpleglitter and I cleaned several rooms of the house_of_clocks today. purpleglitter did more than me. The playroom is usable again. It was essentially a dead room in the condition it was in. The living room was in relatively good condition and is now superclean. Got the big pile of trash out of the downstairs bathroom and made a dent in the kitchen. One more cleaning day and I think the house will be reasonable. Most likely this day will be after Christmas, but I wish it to be soon. I long to live in a clean house again.

purpleglitter came over and cleaned the living room as I swept and merryperseis cleaned most of the kitchen. The house_of_clocks is now cleaner than it has been in a long time. I'm very happy. The is still some more left to be done downstairs, but as I said I'm very happy. Tomorrow I will try to follow suit by cleaning my room.

Yesterday afternoon, I went to the Salvation Army with merryperseis and purpleglitter. I got a ton of new clothes for only $15. I didn't get as much summer stuff as I had planned, but I did get a wonderful knee-length piece of lingerie that will make a very nice summer dress.

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After we got back from the Salvation Army, we went and fed the geese at Spy Pond. Even the swans ate out of my hand. Only the ducks are too timid. Or too short. Or are simply afraid getting in front of the geese.

merrryperseis brought bubbles. After she was done making bubbles, she let me make them. The geese didn't quite know what to make of the bubbles. They'd inspect them as they floated by and the scurry away if they got too close.

A woman who had her toddler at the pond brought her to see the bubbles. She loved playing in the bubbles. She stayed for about ten minutes as I blew bubbles at her. It was big fun. She kept reaching his hand out trying to catch one. They always seemed to miss her hand and hit her face. She didn't seem to mind. In fact she laughed every time one hit her face.

I took much time to smell the flowers on the way back. Spy Pond is a little piece of paradise right in Arlington.

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After Spy Pond, we sat and talked in the livingroom fo an hour or so, then purpleglitter went home. Rosey joined merryperseis and I on a trip to the Diesel Café. The Diesel's front windows can be raised in a garage door type fashion as they were today. We sat at a table right on the edge of the sidewalk, which was very convenient, as Rosey could smoke and talk to us at the same time.

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Back at home, merryperseis and I spent a beautiful romantic evening together. The day would have been perfect if I didn't have a freakout in the closet after merryperseis went to bed. I woke her up and she helped me get back into a good state so I could sleep. Even with that sour note, the day was wonderful, One I wouldn't mind repeating.

Something was just knocking on the pantry window. Knocking. It wasn't the window rattling. I know what that sounds like. Something was knocking. I looked out the window. Nothing. Just snow sitting on the roof below.

Just something new to add to the growing list of oddities here at the house_of_clocks. Most visitors to the house_of_clocks have seen people walking in the downstairs hallway. People that aren't there. I'm suspicious that those who haven't just don't talk about it. Doors here have been known to open and shut on their own in still air. Doors that greatly outnumber the rooms. Sometimes I can hear people moving about when there is no one else here. We have found secret compartments the walls. The faucets behave in odd, and sometimes unpredictable manners. The whole place feels strange. Unworldly.

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I ask myself, how did we end up with this place? The rent is so cheap, compared to anyplace of equivalent size, location, and upkeep. Two floors. Two full huge baths. Tons of rooms. Gigantic closets. Built in window seat in the livingroom. Amazingly crafted walls, moldings, and windows. The place is out of a dream. We should be paying at least twice as much in rent as we are. Probably more. None of us should be able to afford to live here. It seems outlandish that it just fell into our lap.

It's walking distance to the T, with a bus that stops practically at the front door. Walgreens is a minute away and Arlington Center is 5. You can see Spy Pond from the sidewalk in front of the house. Hardwood everything. Beautiful lighting fixtures. Two large bathrooms. Every bedroom is huge with giant closets. Eat-in kitchen and superb livingroom. All for $1600!! Wow! Wow! I hope I'm able to secure it. I need to gather two definite yeses. Quick!

purpleglitter wanted cosmopolitans. While we knew the ingredients, we unfortunately did not know the proportions. Lake made a guess as to the proportions, and was… well… very wrong. But the results were very drinkable and very strong. We dubbed them lakemopolitans.

Shortly after we started drinking, merryperseis joined us in the livingroom, and we contacted transgirl on AIM and asked her to come over. I had never met transgirl IRL, and only met her a brief time ago online. I made everybody lakemopolitans.

Unfortunately, I underestimated the strength of a lakemopolitan, and soon was spinning. Shortly thereafter, I passed out in the bed. A number of minutes after I left the room, I am told, merryperseis went to bed as well.

purpleglitter and transgirl got along fabulously for many hours after everyone else went to sleep. This makes me very happy. I like to see purpleglitter being social again. She has been trying to break her reclusiveness, and this is a very good step.

zarthon came over last night. Spent some time sitting around the livingroom and kitchen. Mostly idle chit chat. But, sometimes idle chit chat is good.

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Stressed out today. Dealing with Social Security Disability. They resent me some papers that I have to sign and send back (I lost them the first two times they sent them to me). Only the papers that they sent me are BLANK. Now I have to go into the office today to try to get them to print me out some more. If not, I have to wait until they can resend the forms yet again. I'm sure I'm highly annoying them. I hate bureaucracies! I have the sinking feeling I'm going to run through all these loops and wait and wait and then simply be turned down again. It's all very disheartening.

I sat in the livingroom and watched some funny animal video show with Lake. Skateboarding dogs and deer breaking into peoples houses.

Drank a glass of Boone's Farm Strawberry Hill. I know I'm not technically supposed to drink alcohol with the Risperdal, but I don't really care. I have a friend that takes it and drinks often, so I'm not worried.

The Risperdal is starting to kick in and make me sleepy, so it's off to bed for me.

While moving Lake's office into the livingroom Wednesday, I found the orange journal I'd been looking for. Flipping though it this morning I found an entry about Madeleine I wanted to put in this journal.

September 1st, 2000 9:30pm I love Madeleine. She's so sweet. Bad things happened to her a long time ago. She has DID as well. I see it now. She switches from happy to mad Madeleine back and forth. Mad Madeleine remembers or is there, and happy Madeleine doesn't remember. She is so lonely. She wants to reach out, but she can't. Only by reaching out to her can she be reached. I won't let anything bad happen to her again.

When we adopted Madeleine, we were told she had been abused at her last home. The first month she was living with us, she would flinch anytime anyone came near her. She's calmed down quite a bit in the last four years, but she still is understandably a little timid.

I understand that I can't really diagnose Madeleine like that. I understand that I was probably projecting. But that is what I was seeing when I wrote the entry.

Slow day. Mostly just watched tv and played with Lake. It's too hot to leave the air conditioned sanctity of the bedroom and livingroom. After Doctor Who tonight, I'm going to make the textures I meant to make yesterday.

Lake finished her part of the cleaning deal tonight rather than going to Stop & Shop. My playroom is now clean.