merrypersies and I went to the Whole Foods in Alewife yesterday. Walking back to the Alewife T stop, we watched the rain clouds coming in. We had no idea what was in store for us.

A few drips preceded what was to come. They brought little warning. merryperseis was still unsure if it was even worth it to take out her umbrella. She decided to take it out, but it really wasn't any help.

The storm lashed out with what essentially was a wall of water. Our umbrellas snapped instantly and we were soaked. Not the kind of soaked where you run through the rain hoping to get out before you become "too wet". This was an instant soaking. We were immersed. The sheets of rain and then the hail pelted us as we ran towards the nearest building. The nearest building wasn't nearly near enough, but we ran towards it anyway.

It was very disorientating, everything moved so fast. The hail was pea-sized and we were never in any real danger, but it did get the adrenaline going. We sat under the awning of the Alewife Towers until the storm subsided a bit and sloshed our way back to Arlington.

For breakfast yesterday I had a veggie burger with basil mozzarella cheese and barbecue sauce; for lunch I had pizza balls with basil mozzarella, faux ham, and faux turkey topped with parmesan cheese; for dinner I had spaghetti in pizza sauce with parmesan cheese; for my healthy snack I had cashews.

Food went well, but I only got half of my half hour of exercise in with a walk up to Arlington Center and back in last evening's thunderstorm. Getting in my exercise is going to be hard right now because I've been having lots of wobbly/dizzy/fally/seizurey/whatever-the-hell-who-knows-the-doctors-apparently-don't episodes, but I will not let that be an excuse. I will continue to try to make Project Three Meals work. I refuse to let this crap control my life.

I saw a double rainbow this evening after a quick and violent thunderstorm. Perhaps a good omen?

The thunderstorm feels perfect right now.

Did quite bad at Project Three Meals yesterday. Essentially had four meals. Meal one was spaghetti o's, meal two was four cheese farfalle, meal three was vegetarian corn dogs, and meal four was a concoction I through together with nutrela, peppers, mushrooms, tomatoes, and red wine vinegar. I also had many unhealthy snacks including cookies and mounds bars. On top of all that, I got absolutely no exercise. I'll just have to try harder today.

I hear thunder, time to unplug the computer.

Thursday, zarthon took purpleglitter and I to see Charlie and the Chocolate Factory with Michelle, Howard, and Alex. I had little doubt that it would be amazing with the combination of Johnny Depp and Tim Burton. Depp was truly unique as Willy Wonka, with a very grown-up child performance. Something was definitely amiss in Willy's brain, and I like that. Crazy is good, and positive crazy characters are even better. I've never seen the 1972 adaptation with Gene Wilder, I have read Roald Dahl's book so I already knew the general plot.

After the movie, the six of us went to dinner at Bennigans. The veggie burger there was so realistic that I thought they had actually gave me a meaty burger. But, zarthon (an avid meat aficionado) tasted the burger and assured me that it was most definitely not meat. I was still a bit hesitant to eat it, but I was hungry and trusted zarthon's meat tasting abilities.

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scattermew came over to the house_of_clocks today. We hung out in my room watching the light show in the sky. A house across the street got nailed. It was actually the building that houses the electrology office that I had some work done at in 1999. I never ended up getting the whole job done, only about 20% of it. But that is a tangent.

In the middle of the storm we decided to walk to the Chai Café. We stopped briefly in front of Video Horizons, where scattermew hid under the overhang. I stood between the street and the sidewalk and held the umbrella as high I as could yelling "lightning!". The pole in the umbrella is metal, but not 10 feet long, so I it really wasn't quite the right tool for the Ten Foot Metal Pole Dance.

At the chai café I had Chole Kulcha and a Limca, my usual. It was as usual, quite good.

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This evening purpleglitter and I went to the Super 88. It's a large Asian supermarket in at the South Bay Plaza in Boston about a half hour drive from the house_of_clocks. Unfortunately, when we got back to Arlington, I realized that I forgot my pocketbook in my carriage. We had to drive all the way back to get it, causing purpleglitter to miss all her Sunday shows. I'm always making stupid mistakes like that.

The lights from the storm last night were nice. purpleglitter turned off all the lights in her apartment and we watched the lovely flashes. I love thunderstorms. While I didn't get out in it last night, playing in summer downpours is the highlight of the season. Refreshing, freeing, fun. And the puddlesplashing. I don't think I will ever outgrow puddlesplashing.

Yesterdays storm brought with it a much needed cool front. The temperature was down right cool last night, something very welcome after the oppressive heat of late. The high today is supposed to be around 85°F (29°C, 303K); which while still too hot for my tastes, is definitely an improvement over the absolutely nasty days we've endured recently. I look forward to autumn with its temperate days, cool nights, and painted landscapes.

I started reading The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success by Deepak Chopra today. As per not_you's advise, I'm taking it slow, only reading a little each day so I can fully digest it. I read through the first law today, the "Law of Pure Potentiality" a passage from the introduction has really peeked my interest in the book, as it expresses one of my core beliefs about the nature of the universe.

"The physical universe is nothing other than the Self curving back within Itself to experience Itself as spirit mind and physical matter. In other words, all process of creation are processes through which the Self or divinity expresses Itself. Consciousness in motion expresses itself as the objects of the universe in the eternal dance of life"

The chapter on the first spiritual law stresses the need to become in tune with the universe, the spirit of creation. Finding one's true Self, and learning balance between Self and the Universe (which is actually the same thing) is the key to unleashing pure potentiality and creativity, where anything is possible. I want to try the various methods suggested by this book to achieve balance and pure potentiality: meditation, communication with nature, silence, and non-judgment. In fact, I'm going to start meditating twice a day ("taking time each day to be silent, to just be" as Deepak Chapra puts it), in addition to working out once a day (not suggested in the book). I'm also going to get out to Spy Pond more and start making regular trips to the Great Meadow come Spring. I really have no excuse not to do these things. I have no job, I'm not in school. I could be doing so much with my day to better myself, it's time I started to.

I find that my thunderstorm CD is very good to meditate with, as it drowns out the traffic of Mass Ave. But I'm also considering just being with the sounds of Mass Ave. The comes in gentle waves, it might not be a bad idea. I also want to check out the used CD shops when I get money again for ambient CDs, like brooks, surf, and rain. As odd as it may seem. Silence is ideal to meditate with, but I can only really have that around 3:00am, which I will take advantage of. But as I want to meditate at least twice a day, and cannot always do so in science, I want to pick the least distracting sounds I can for my meditations.

I have a feeling my life is about to take a new, better, calmer direction. I'm looking forward to it. The last few years have been a typhoon that has left me tired and battered. I want to find some peace, and I think I'm finally starting to realize I need to make that journey.

Good news: I'm out of the hospital.

Bad news: the house_of_clocks was struck by lightening last night. the router is fried. the cable modem is fried. merryperseis's computer is fried. and the good phone is fried. so we won't be online for some time.

More bad news: I've lost my license and my library card and bank card.

posted by purpleglitter

After I left Harvard Square, I met riga_mortia at her house. I'm blessed to have gotten to spend another wonderful night with her. I’m blessed again to have gotten to sleep next to her yet again. The best, most wonderful sleep. I’m yet blessed again to have had her make me breakfast in bed in the morning. I’m so completely in love with her.

She is beautiful and wonderful and wounded and fighting all at once. She’s amazing. She inspires me. She, too, is a broken angel, but she’s still flying. Somehow. The thunderous storms still sometimes come to batter her. The viscous winds still sometimes knock her to the ground. But, she is still flying. Through it all, with tattered wings and shattered bones and bloodied flesh, she still flies. She is still radiant.

I haven't really felt like posting the last couple days for various reasons. I plan on going back to my daily (or more than daily) posting schedule. A brief update of the last few days follows.

I woke up Saturday and found out some very nasty events had befallen riga_mortia. She is a wonderful person, and I'm very worried about her. I went to see her and offer what support I could.

Saturday night was a wrenching night for purpleglitter and I. We covered a lot of ground and went over many issues that we needed to. It was extremely painful for both of us, but we got through it, and I think our relationship will be better because of it.

Sunday, I woke up early, still not recovered from the previous night. I went to brunch with grrldan and Melissa. After brunch, we all spontaneously went to the Great Meadow. It was a simply beautiful day. Even though, on the way home, the clouds bellowed with thunder and threatened to drench us, the threats were only bluffs.

That evening, purpleglitter and I went to see Spider-man with zarthon. Spider-man was incredibly cheesy. Actually "incredibly cheesy" doesn't come close to expressing how extremely and utterly cheesy the film was.

Today, I've teetered between suicidal and exuberant. Everything is so unstable. What little hold I have on reality seems to be slipping away. I'm scared, because I don't know if things are going to get better. I see the system as a whole becoming more and more unstable and nobody seems to be able to do anything about it. We're supposed to be getting better, but we're not.

If I were a stone, I would be... geode
If I were a tree, I would be an... weeping willow
If I were a bird, I would be a... flamingo
If I were an insect, I would be a... moth
If I were a machine, I would be a... computer
If I were a tool, I would be a... paint brush
If I were a fruit, I would be a... lemon
If I were a flower, I would be a... rose
If I were a kind of weather, I would be... thunderstorm
If I were a mythical creature, I would be a... elf
If I were a musical instrument, I would be a... melodeon
If I were a kind of profession, I would be a... artist
If I were an animal, I would be a... cat
If I were anything in the world, I would be... nothing
If I were a colour, I would be... purple
If I were a fragrance, I would be... baby powder
If I were an emotion, I would be... excitement
If I were a state or feeling, I would be... juxtaposition
If I were a vegetable, I would be a... pepper
If I were a sound, I would be... thunderstorm
If I were an Element, I would be... fire

We had a wonder thunderstorm. Marvelous lightning. I ended up falling asleep during the storm. I slept for about 7 hours.

My shoulder and neck still hurt. I'm now worried if one the alters bruised it while I wasn't there.

Had some chips and salsa with raspberry ginger ale.

The Lesbian Avengers are having a "back to school" shopping visibility event at the Cambridgeside Galleria today at 1pm. If I'm up (who knows), I want to go.